No, Not Yours

No, Not Yours!

An enterprising person put together plans for a “Left Shark” toy, aptly named after a character in Katy Perry’s halftime show and tried selling it for $24.99. Katy’s lawyers weren’t happy and send a cease & desist letter. If you have a 3-D printer, you can get the plans for free from Thingiverse

A Texas judge ruled that the pinebox that was originally used to bury Lee Harvey Oswald belongs to his brother and not the funeral home that has stored it unclaimed since 1982…

Like Big Macs? Live in Australia? You could have bid on the very first bottle of Big Mac sauce (out of 200) that will be available for sale in a limited-edition-we-ain’t-gonna-do-this-again promo from McDonald’s. The money will go to charity, the first bottle is already at $18,000 US dollars & apparently you can get small cups of the sauce for 50 cents. I like Big Macs, but not THAT much…

Dude, knock it off already with calling female real estate agents to look at properties in the dark – they’re just not into it!

Just gimme some leads! The first lesbian helpline opened up in India with a majority of callers being MEN and many asking for phone numbers! You’re doing it wrong!

Yes, you did intend to kill his penis. A woman splashed acid on the crotch of a guy that had secretly videoed them having sex which went viral. The guy is pissing through a tube & prognosis for making more secret porn starring roles is grave…

Not Safe For Stomachs! This guy (who apparently no longer wants to work in public) tattooed his eyeballs, added hardware under his skin, & surgically removed his nose so he could kind of look like Marvel’s Red Skull. I wonder what surgeon put his license on the line to do that?

This makes sense, “try it before you buy it boob implants“. Matty & Dan wholeheartedly approve!

Coming soon to a dispensary near you, a pot vending machine! Matty agrees with one of the dispensary owners – why have a machine when they have to be screened by staff before using it? Why not just buy from the dispensary?

No Joy” is a creepy video someone made with a montage of photos from the closed down Joyland amusement park out West. Matty wondered why a lot of the rides and such were sold online or sent to the scrapyard for cash…

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Until next week Junkies!

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